Children are parents' property ... Really?
Adults can express love to children in any way they want to. Do you agree?
Talking to your kids about sex is like showing the villain the way?
Hello, I'm Cindy Sirinya Bishop, Actress, MC, Writer. I'm the author of "My Body, My Rules". Being a mother is my principal career.
<h2>CINDY SIRINYA BISHOP Actress/MC/Writer/Mother</h2>
You may wonder why Cindy, who is a model, an actress, and an MC is writing a children's book. It's because I've been in this field for more than 3 years. I've seen violence and sexual harassment against women and children, both at a national and international level.
Working in this field has made me realise that the major cause of sexual harassment in Thai society is a mindset that lacks respect and consent or even a safe space within a family. Time and again, we nurture boys to man up. We tell them not to cry, to keep emotions to themselves while telling our girls to be polite, humble, and don't make noise.
Moreover, we don't talk to our children about sex.
<h2>MY BODY MY RULES</h2>
No-one can deny that nowadays we see more cases of sexual harassment. Many occur to children. Our kids face threats from online media, friends, from school and strangers. Sometimes from teachers or adults as well. What is most saddening though is that sexual harassment can also be from family members.
We need to train our kids to understand that they have the right to their bodies. Similarly, they need to have the same respect for others. This is key for them to grow to become adults with emotional stability and with good foundations to foster relationships with others.
<h2>5 Rules to Protect the Rights to Your Body</h2>
On CI Talks today, I will introduce 5 easy approaches that parents can use to start talking to their children to instill awareness on rights to their bodies while respecting the rights of others.
<h3>Protect and use Proper Words for Private Parts</h3>
The first rule is that everyone has his and her private parts. Kids should learn the correct terms.
Kids should know what to call private parts of male and female bodies. We should talk openly with them. Just tell them they are penis and vagina. Why? Kids should have the correct information. One day, if they happen to be sexual harassed, they will be able to tell us which parts of their bodies were harassed. Their accounts may be beneficial to any investigation.
<h3>Our Private Parts are Private</h3>
Secondly, private parts must not be seen or touched. Kids should learn not to do that to others.
Sometimes, kids tease each other by touching genital areas which is perceived as being cute as peers are doing it. We need to change this mindset. If we don't foster it at the beginning that these parts shouldn't be touched, when they grow up, kids may not know or understand that they can refuse to be touched.
In fact, when kids can use the toilet by themselves, when they can wash themselves, that's when there's no longer any need for others to touch any part of their bodies. Your children will be able to look after and take care of their own bodies.
<h3>Let No One Enter Your Private Space Without Permission</h3>
Thirdly, no one can enter our private space unless given permission. And we should maintain spaces between each other.
A good way to explain to your kids is that a public place is where everyone can go. This includes a mall, a school or a supermarket. A private place is somewhere that only you have access to, like a bedroom or a toilet. If anyone wants to come into this private space, they need your permission.
This is a basic right that everyone has. Kids need to know this.
<h3>We have 100% Right to Our Bodies</h3>
Fourthly, your body belongs to you.
You have the right to decide who can touch and this applies to others as well. Hence, consent needs to be granted first. Kids need to understand that they have the right to refuse and consent is needed. In the future, the issue of consent will be crucial.
Commonly, we think that children are their parents' property. Parents may express love to their kids in any way they want. Sometimes parents force their kids to kiss elderly family members against their will.
There are many ways to show love and respect while being considerate of everyone's rights.
<h3>Understand the Difference of Good and Bad Touches</h3>
Fifth, we need to teach children to understand the difference between good and bad touches and know how to refuse.
Good touch refers to any touch that makes you feel warm, safe and understanding. We need to teach our kids to be aware also that bad touch is any touch that makes you feel unsafe or hurt. For example, when kids are bullied. Any touch that you don't give consent to, even cheek pinching, if you don't like it, that's a bad touch.
Most important though is touching private parts. If your kids encounter this, you need to tell them to refuse by saying "stop" or "no". Then try to get away from that incident. Don't keep it to yourself. Go and tell a trustworthy adult.
<h2>5 Takeaways to Help You Spark Change</h2>
I hope that the approaches I offer will help guide parents or inspire new ways to talk to your kids about sex. In the end, creating a safe family space within the family to have frank discussions on everything will help you instill change for your kids and our society.
Sexual harassment within family may sound serious but actually the solutions lie in front of us. It begins with you and your family.
<a href="https://citalks.com">CI Talks</a>

Read the My Body My Rules script from Cindy Bishop's video talk on CI Talks. Get tips to teach kids about their bodies to end sexual violence & spark change.

My Body My Rules Script - Cindy Bishop | CI Talks

My Body My Rules Script

Do you know that Thailand is among the top ten countries with the highest number of violence against women and children. The mindset within our society believes that men have power over women, that women are the weaker gender. I think it's time to change that mindset.
Sexually harassed because of your dress, really? Change starts with you.
<h2>Don't Tell Me How to Dress Cindy Sirinya Bishop</h2>
Model / Actress UN Women Regional Goodwill Ambassador for Asia and the Pacific Founder of the "Don't Tell Me How to Dress" campaign
CINDY SIRINYA BISHOP Thai Model/Activist
The "Don't Tell Me How to Dress" campaign started when I saw a newspaper headline, warning women to dress properly during the 2018 Songkran Festival to prevent incidents of sexual harassment.
Initially I thought "wait, is this the only measure you propose? Why are women being warned, but nothing is done to prevent men from inflicting violence or sexual harassment?"
It sparked something inside me. Then I took out my phone and posted what was on my mind. "As a person who was harassed during the Songkran Festival, I did not dress in any way inappropriate. It's not a woman's fault. Is it?"
I didn't think that this video would go viral. The hashtag I typed "#DontTellMeHowtoDress" took off. It became global news a few days later. I then partnered with the Women and Men Progressive Movement Foundation (WMP) and approached UN Women about our campaign.
We held an exhibition displaying clothes of those who have been harassed. So people can see clearly that it's got nothing to do with how they dressed. There have been cases involving a two-year old kid at home, a student on the way to study, and a mother who has been harassed by her own child. I want people to stop blaming women and clothes and realise the real reasons.
<blockquote>"Stop Blaming How Women Dress. Men Should Control Themselves"</blockquote>
The real reasons are that offenders have been fuelled by the media, intimacy, exposure, alcohol, or drug abuse. But in any case, these stem from a mindset that violence towards women is normal or acceptable. From UN statistics, more than 35% of women have faced violence in their lives. But can you believe that only about 10% of those women who have been harassed or experienced violence went to the police. This is because they are usually questioned about what they were wearing at the time.
I have been through an incident and, at the time, I had now idea what to do. I was shocked and paralysed, didn't know who to turn to. Do you know that I had been harassed by five men. They touched all parts of my body. I was only 17. When they left, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know who to turn to. So I went home and kept quiet.
I didn't mention this to anyone until I started the campaign "Don't Tell Me How to Dress". I have been speaking out more. Back then, I felt as if no one would listen to me or they wouldn't believe it. This is the feeling of every woman who has gone through a similar experience. No-one would believe them. It's not worth speaking out. So, just keep quiet.
I continue doing this today because I have a platform, I have a voice. I want to speak on behalf of the many women who are afraid of speaking. Today, more people listen to you and you should stand up and say you have gone through this. I'm worth it, I'm loved and I'm proud. Sexual harassment can happen to anyone, anytime.
So today in CI Talks. I have 5Ds, or what we call the Bystander Intervention, that you can use when you are in an incident whether you are a bystander or a victim.
<h3>Distract</h3>
The first D is Distract.
Say you are on the skytrain (BTS) and see a person being harassed, you could use the "asking" technique. Try asking what the next station is. You might pretend to be lost or spill coffee. This technique will let the perpetrator know that you are a witness which can free the victim from the situation.
<h3>Delegate</h3>
The second D is Delegate.
Assess the situation and seek help from someone appropriate. For example you are in a supermarket and see something suspicious. You might want to ask someone, an employee, or a security officer for help. Or you could walk straight up to the victim and ask them directly if they need help.
<h3>Document</h3>
The third D is Document.
Take photos or shoot videos as evidence. Documenting is an approach that is very effective especially if you are the victim. Specify clearly the date and time. If possible, take photos of road signs or the surroundings to be used as evidence of where it happened. If you are the one taking photos or videos, you should ask the victim first about what they want done with the evidence. If you post on social media without consent, it may make the nightmare worse for the victim.
<h3>Delay</h3>
The fourth D is Delay.
If you witness sexual harassment situation but can't offer help in time, you can still, after the incident, approach and talk to the victim. You can ask whether the victim needs help, whether you can call someone, whether you are allowed to send out the evidence you took, or whether you can contact any authority or agency. This is to offer help and support to the victim.
<h3>Direct</h3>
And the last D is Direct.
If you witness a situation or if you are the person being harassed, say "stop!" loudly. This can stop the perpetrator. Often perpetrators of sexual harrassment exploit women's lack of courage.
From what I've said, you will realise that sexual harrassment and violence against women have no place in our society. Everyone, regardless of their gender, deserves respect and acceptance.
Today, you can Be Part of the Change. Change Starts with You.
<a href="&rdquo;https:/citalks.com&rdquo;">CI Talks</a>

Read the Don't Tell Me How to Dress video talk script on CI Talks. Find inspiration from Cindy Bishop & spark change by helping to stop sexual harassment.

Don't Tell Me How to Dress Script | CI Talks

Don't Tell Me How to Dress Video Talk Script

Watch My Body My Rules, a video talk presented by Cindy Sirinya Bishop and be inspired to spark change in society by talking with your children about rights and consent to their bodies and other people's. With a new mindset, the next generation could end sexual violence.

There are many ways for you to spark change in yourself but what happens when you want to change the mindset of an entire society? Watch My Body, My Rules presented by Thai model, actress, MC and author Cindy Sirinya Bishop and find inspiration from someone who is on a personal mission to change the mindset in Thailand and put an end to sexual violence inflicted on children and adults alike.
Cindy Bishop has been both a victim and witness of sexual harassment and after launching her #DontTellMeHowToDress campaign in 2018 and becoming a UN Women Regional Goodwill Ambassador, she has come to realisation that the root cause of sexual harassment in Thailand is &ldquo;mindset&rdquo;. Media and traditions in the country have contributed to a mindset that can disregard the rights of others, disrespect the need for consent and even jeopardise safety at home.
Sexual harassment has become more of an issue in Thailand in the recent past and Cindy attributes this to a traditional culture that nurtures boys to man-up and girls to be polite, demure and humble. Infuse these societal traditions with modern media coupled with the reluctance of parents to openly discuss sex with their children and the result is an increase of sexual harassment from friends, strangers, teachers, adults and even family members.
In My Body My Rules, which is episode 2 of Cindy&rsquo;s Generation Equality web video series, she provides a canvas that focuses on the need to educate children at a young age to understand that they have the right to their bodies and that they need to afford everyone else exactly the same rights.
What you will takeaway:
<ol>
<li>Protect and use Proper Words for Private Parts</li>
<li>Our Private Parts are Private</li>
<li>Let No One Enter Your Private Space Without Permission</li>
<li>We have 100% Right to Our Bodies</li>
<li>Understand the Difference of Good and Bad Touches</li>
</ol>
When parents become comfortable talking openly about these subjects with their children, is when a new generation with a new mindset can blossom, a mindset that fosters the right of privacy and respects the notion of consent.

Watch My Body My Rules, a video talk presented by Cindy Bishop on CI Talks. Be inspired to spark change in society by talking with your children about bodies.

My Body My Rules - Cindy Bishop | CI Talks

My Body My Rules

Join Thai model, actress, television host and author Cindy Sirinya Bishop in her video talk that goes behind the scenes of her "Don't Tell Me How to Dress" social media campaign, launched to change the mindset of Thai people to stop sexual harassment.

Have you ever experienced Songkhran in Bangkok? The Songkhran festival takes place from April 13 to 15 each year and marks the Thai New Year. April 13th is Family Day while April 14 is the elderly day when traditionally the younger generation pour water onto elders&rsquo; hands to show their respect. In Thai, the ceremony is called "rod nam dam hua". This is the more spiritual and traditional form of Songkhran.
Then there is the modern version which takes the meaning of &ldquo;water festival&rdquo; to the extreme, transforming what once was gentle water splashing into a full-blown water fight. Tools of choice include barrels, buckets, hoses, bowls and all manner of plastic water guns. If you are in certain districts of Bangkok, Pattaya, Phuket or Chiang Mai, you won't just get a little wet, you&rsquo;ll be soaked from head to toe.
Whilst most Songkhran revelers are there to have fun and enjoy the public holiday, there is unfortunately a darkside to the festival, perpetrated by a male minority. Women have spoken of being molested and groped particularly in the midst of the water fights.
Now let's wind the clock back to the run up to the Songkhran Festival in 2018. Local authorities issued an advisory directed at women stating that they should not dress sexily if they wanted to avoid sexual harassment over the water festival. This riled Cindy Bishop; women were being told that they should dress appropriately while men were being exonerated entirely.
Using her voice and social media presence, Cindy Bishop responded with a video saying &ldquo;Women have the right to dress however we choose, as long as it&rsquo;s not illegal. Sexual assault and harassment is never the woman&rsquo;s fault! Tell men to keep their hands to themselves!&rdquo;. The video went viral, not just in Thailand but overseas as well, and this is how her well known #DontTellMeHowToDress campaign began.
Inspired to further the campaign, Cindy partnered with Women and Men Progressive Movement Foundation (WMP) and UN Women. Together they organized an exhibition titled &ldquo;The Social Power Exhibition against Sexual Assault&rdquo;, an initiative inspired by a University of Kansas exhibition where they displayed clothing from sexual assault victims to illustrate that it has nothing to do with how women dress.
Since then, Cindy Bishop has become a crusader in Thailand for women&rsquo;s rights and gender equality, using the power of her voice to speak on behalf of women who are too afraid to speak. A UN Women Regional Goodwill Ambassador, Cindy has dedicated her time to help spark change so that women and girls everywhere can live their lives free of violence and discrimination whilst enjoying equal rights and opportunities.

Watch Don't Tell Me How to Dress with CI Talks Coach, Cindy Sirinya Bishop. Find inspiration from her campaign to stop sexual harassment & help spark change.

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Don't Tell Me How To Dress

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