Today, Dr. Fern is going to talk about Sex Education What did I just say? (Laugh)

How to Have Good Sex

How to have safe, happy and fun sex. EXCITING | FUN | SAFE Hello, I'm Dr. Fern and I'm a Medical Doctor specializing in Sexually Transmitted Infections (STI's) and Dermatology.

Dr Thanyanan Kangvalpornroj
I'm a Medical Doctor (STIs & Dermatology)

Recently, sexually transmitted diseases have risen sharply in Thailand, especially among teens who don't have the necessary knowledge because sex education is barely taught at school. Schools don't teach about STDs. They only teach how to avoid having sex, not about "sex", sexual arousal or having safe sex to prevent infectious diseases.

They Don’t Teach …

How sex is
How to do it
How to have safe sex

Pre Sex Preparation

Before having sex, consider two things:

  1. Decide whether you want kids. If not, use a condom or the pill.
  2. How you will protect against STDs. Condoms can prevent STDs or use PrEP to reduce the risk of HIV. It is available now. If you often have one night stands or aren't sure if he is infected or not, use the PrEP medicine.

PrEP: Take it 7 days before having sex. It can reduce the risk of HIV by 97%.

The 4 Sexual Response Phases

Next, let's look at the science of sex, and the 4 phases of sexual response. But first you'll need a partner!

1. Excitement, Arousal & Desire

The first step in the act of sex is the Excitement Phase. it happens with bodily contact, no matter which parts, such as kissing or touching body parts.

I suggest you touch the sensitive areas such as neck, ears, hands, genitals or toes. You may not know that this area is erotic for some people.

It's not just physical touch that can stimulate the mood. Words can also make us feel more sensual and erotic. Saying things like "Darling" or "Honey", or toes. You may not know that erotic words and even spanking can make sex more fun.

2. Plateau

The Plateau Phase.

The Plateau Phase is when we're having sex. Our bodies become sexually excited. What are the sensations? Let's start with breasts. Breasts become fuller and the nipples become harder or erect and can also darken, due to increased blood flow.

Down below, at our genitals, men and women secrete lubricating fluids. In women, the vagina enlarges and muscles contract with blood flow causing the labia to swell and become firm. When the male comes inside, it will feel much tighter.

Also, we should know the places that make men and women feel more erotic. For men, as you may already know, it's the tip of the penis that is the most sensitive. We can arouse that part.

For women, it's what's called G-spot which you may have already heard of. Actually, speaking of the G-spot, until recently, no one knew exactly where it was located. We only knew it was within the vagina.

Just as important is the clithoris. The clithoris is, as a foetus, in the same position as the head of the penis, meaning they develop from the same organ. In men, it becomes the tip of the penis. In women, it becomes the clithoris.

Women's erogenous zones are most sensitive. During sex, stimulating the clithoris helps them to reach orgasm quickly. Another spot for men, not so well known, is the perineum. It's what we call the P-spot. It's like the G-spot in women. You can stimulate that spot to give him an intesely erotic experience. It is between the anus and scrotum. Use your finger to lightly massage it.

For those who have sex via the "back door" where the back door is penetrated, is where the prostrate is and another male erogenous zone.

3. Orgasm

The third phase is the “Orgasmic Phase”, the story’s finale. The climax brings the event to a close.

Your body has involuntary contractions. After ejacuation, a sex flush may appear, similar to a rash, over your body. You may get muscle spasms in the hands and feet. This phase can last for about 5-8 minutes in both men and women.

In men, as you may know, orgasm is when the semen comes out. But what about women? Some may secrete milky white fluid from their vagina, similar to men, whilst others, like you see in porn, can "squirt" from their vulva. That is simply urine.

For women, orgasm is not just achieved through vaginal penetration. As said, the erogenous zone is the clithoris. Sometimes just touching there can bring a woman to orgasm. For some women, just caressing the nipples can bring an orgasm on as well.

4. Resolution

The fourth phase is called the Resolution Phase. It's when both parties are finished. We feel a sense of well-being and fatigue as our muscles relax.

If you want to go for round 2 What should you do? Most women can start again immediately because their resolution phase is short. Women recover very quickly and can start again straight away. But men need more time because their recovery takes longer. You may have to wait from 10 minutes to hours before you are both ready again.

Cleaning Up After Sex

Once we've finished, we need to wash ourselves. Women should use water to wash their outer parts only. Some people put fingers in which isn't OK, because fingers can convey germs inside.

Men should just clean with water.

If you have anal sex, clean around the anus with water. I had a patient who inserted a bar of soap into their anus, moving it in and out, thinking it would help make it clean, but that's totally wrong and can actually cause injury.

Sexual Awareness

Having sex is natural and anyone can do it. We need to communicate with kids properly and make them feel safe talking to us. Awareness leads to better birth control and helps prevent early pregnancy and STDs as well.


The sex education video series is brought to you by CI Talks. Find more inspirational videos and stories that spark change on and be inspired to take action and grow.

Watch the CI Talks Sex Education Video Web Series.